Parenting together can be challenging, even for happily married couples. So, unsurprisingly, co-parenting as divorced parents brings its unique set of challenges. However, you and your ex have committed to this approach because you believe each parent has a role in your children’s lives. While resources like Helpguide.org provide useful tips, here are additional ideas to consider for effective co-parenting:
1. Prioritize Safety Above All
Is your ex’s behavior endangering your children’s safety? While it can be frustrating when your ex isn’t fully abiding by your co-parenting agreement, the first question to ask yourself is, “Are my children safe when they are with my ex?” If they are in immediate danger, call local emergency services right away. If the situation is concerning but not an emergency, consult with a lawyer to discuss what steps may be necessary to ensure your children’s safety.
And importantly, talk to a lawyer before taking any action. Even if your concerns are valid, you can’t unilaterally ignore a court-ordered visitation schedule. A judge’s approval is required to modify any existing orders.
2. Communication is Key
If co-parenting isn’t going as planned, try discussing the issues directly with your ex. Focus on finding solutions and be specific about why you think your ex’s behavior may not be helping the children. Avoid rehashing your divorce—this should be a conversation about the kids. Sometimes, your ex may have reasons for their actions that you weren’t aware of. By calmly presenting your concerns, you may both be able to find workable solutions together.
3. Seek Professional Support to Stay Sane
Co-parenting can be emotionally exhausting, and you may find yourself overwhelmed at times. Consider bringing in a neutral third party, such as a parenting coach or therapist, to help mediate disputes. A few sessions could provide a fresh perspective or offer tools for managing the challenges of co-parenting. Expert insights can be invaluable when emotions run high. Rosalind Sedacca’s “Coping with Co-parenting After Divorce” offers excellent advice on this topic.
Co-parenting is a journey that requires patience and flexibility, but you don’t have to do it alone. If you’re struggling with co-parenting issues or any other divorce-related concerns, contact DiPietro Family Law Group. We are a family law firm dedicated to helping families move past conflict and into a healthier, happier future.