To Be Or Not To Be: Reconciliation vs. Divorce In Virginia

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Divorce is often a challenging time for couples, especially those with children. Sometimes, spouses may attempt to reconcile or even call off the divorce entirely. While reconciliation might be the right choice for some, it isn’t always successful and can sometimes cause more harm than good. Moreover, reconciliation comes with important legal consequences that you should be aware of.

Grounds for Divorce in Virginia

In Virginia, there are two types of divorce: fault-based and no-fault.

Fault-Based Divorce

In a fault-based divorce, one spouse must allege that the other spouse has engaged in unacceptable conduct, such as adultery, cruelty, constructive desertion, or actual desertion. When served with divorce papers, the accused spouse can either admit or deny the allegations and may also present defenses or counterclaims.

If the couple decides to reconcile after divorce papers have been filed, they must notify the court of their intent to withdraw the case. This process is known as a “nonsuit” in Virginia.

No-Fault Divorce

In a no-fault divorce, neither spouse accuses the other of wrongdoing. The couple separates by not living together as husband and wife for a specific period of time. Couples with children or contested property issues must be separated for at least one year before they can file for a no-fault divorce. If there are no children, and the couple has a legally executed settlement agreement regarding property, they may obtain a no-fault divorce after a six-month separation.

The Impact of Reconciliation

The primary purpose of the waiting periods for a no-fault divorce is to provide the couple with an opportunity to reconcile. However, reconciliation isn’t simply a matter of wanting to get back together. Legally, reconciliation occurs if the spouses:

  • Present themselves as married to others,
  • Live together in the same home,
  • Share the same bed, and/or
  • Engage in sexual intercourse.

While isolated incidents of cohabitation or sexual intercourse are unlikely to count as reconciliation, consistently living together or having ongoing discussions about getting back together could suffice as proof of reconciliation.

Legal Consequences of Reconciliation

Reconciliation has significant legal consequences. It nullifies any grounds for a fault-based divorce and also “restarts the clock” for no-fault divorces. For instance, if a couple with children lives apart for five months before reconciling for three months, and then decides to divorce again, the one-year separation period resets. The couple will need to live apart for another full year before they can obtain a no-fault divorce.

To avoid this situation, couples may consider entering into a settlement agreement that remains valid regardless of reconciliation. This agreement protects your rights should the reconciliation fail.

Conclusion

If you’re considering divorce, already going through one, or contemplating reconciliation, it’s essential to consult with a qualified and compassionate family law attorney to understand your legal options and protect your rights.

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