The first holiday season after a divorce is often the most difficult, and it all begins with the awkwardness of Thanksgiving dinner. Spending time with family can help ease the stress, but first, you need to determine who will spend Thanksgiving with the kids.
Options For Dividing Up Thanksgiving
Before deciding where your kids will go for Thanksgiving, it’s important to understand the full range of options available. Here are a few preferred approaches:
1. One Parent Always Takes the Kids on Thanksgiving
This option works best if one parent isn’t particularly attached to Thanksgiving, has to work on the holiday, or opts to prioritize another holiday. In this scenario, the same parent would have the kids every Thanksgiving.
2. Parents Can Choose to Alternate Years
One parent can take the kids for the entire day of Thanksgiving one year, and the other parent takes them the following year. This approach is ideal for parents who both want to celebrate Thanksgiving with their kids but live too far apart for multiple visits on the same day to be practical.
3. Parents Can Split the Day
One parent can have the kids in the morning and early afternoon, while the other can take them for the rest of the day. This plan only works if both parents—and the places they plan to visit—are close enough for convenient travel.
4. Spending Thanksgiving Together
Surprisingly, many parents who remain on good terms after their divorce choose to spend Thanksgiving together. They aim to keep the day a family-oriented holiday, which can be a positive experience for the kids.
Making a Decision
Ultimately, Thanksgiving isn’t about you or your ex — it’s about the well-being of your children. Your goal should be to create a holiday experience that allows your children to make lifelong memories of joy, not conflict. You can always arrange a second holiday celebration on a different day if necessary.
If you and your ex are unable to reach an agreement on how your children will spend the holiday, consider seeking help from a mediator. A neutral third party can help both of you focus on what truly matters: the happiness and well-being of your children. If mediation doesn’t work, a judge may need to settle the issue. Avoiding the discussion entirely is the worst approach, as it could lead to more problems later.
Whether you resolve your differences through mediation or litigation, having the support of a Maryland lawyer who understands the complexities of custody and visitation is essential. Contact DiPietro Family Law today to learn more.